TROLL!

Version 3.90
The storm lasted all night. Gale force winds howled outside, rain hammered the mountain sides and thunder and lighting turned the usual stillness into a pounding, flashing display of nature displeased.
Then it happened. Sometime in the early hours, a huge crashing sound echoed through the tunnels and caverns of the troll den. No-one took much notice and continued to snore away the night. It was only in the morning when anyone found out what it was.
"WHAT IN BLUE BLAZES IS GOING ON HERE?" Cried the chief, his voice booming through the tunnels. "OI! EVERYONE, GET YOUR LAZY, GOOD FOR NOTHING HIDES OUT OF BED AND DOWN TO THE SOUTH GATE!" he cried even louder.
Everyone jumped and rushed as fast as they could, only to find the way blocked by a big curved mass.
"Ere? What's going on?" one of the trolls said.
"Dunno, maybe it caved in during the night." Replied another.
"But it's all green and squishy." Added a third, while poking the mass.
"Everyone, out through the east gate and round to the south."
And so everyone did, to find pacing back and forth in a furious mood the chief, his eyes fixated on a giant frog monster, sitting right in front of the gate.
"Well don't just stand there! Shift it." Ordered the chief.
Everyone looked at each other, dumbstruck.
 "How chief?"
"What do you mean how? ANYWAY POSSIBLE YOU TWERPS! Hit it with your clubs! Throw rocks at it USE BLOODY STRONG LANGUAGE IF IT'LL SHIFT IT!"
Everyone sparked into action.
"Where's Murky? Asked the chief. "Wasn't he guarding the gate last night? I'll skin him alive when I find him for letting this happen! MURKY, WHERE IN BLAZES ARE YOU"
"SOMEONE HELP!" Shouted Murky, in a worried, panicy voice.
"WHERE ARE YOU, YOU TOERAG?" Shouted the chief
"DOWN HERE, UNDER THE FROG!" Replied Murky, to the best of his ability.
And there he was, trapped with his face struggling to stay out of the mud.
"Bloody moron." Mumbled the chief. "How do you miss a frog of this size sneaking up on you?"
For the best part of 2 hours the tribe tried in vain to shift the frog monster. Then, catching your eye, the chief beckoned you over.
"Oi, Fungus, get over here. Now, it's obvious to anyone with half a brain cell, (so that means me and the frog) that we ain't going to shift it like this, so I want you to go to Muddy Lake Creek and buy some backward burp berries.
"Suits me." You think. "Better than scrubbing plates all day. (This being your given task within the clan).
"Take this," says the chief, shoving his medallion into your hands. "You can use it to get credit, they know me round those parts. Now get the berries, and get the hell back 'ere as fast as possible. And don't piss anyone off, with ogres to the west of us, the swamp in the east and us at war with the village to the north, south is the only place we can go without getting killed, so I want to stay on good terms with 'em, you hear me?"
You nod.
"Good, NOW GO YOU LAZY BAG OF BONES!"


The South Gate
Currently, a huge Frog Monster, the size of a house is sitting in a puddle of mud, right in front of the south gate (and on poor old Murky).  Some of your fellow Trolls are here, poking the beast with spears or throwing rocks at it, to no avail. The Chief is also here, puffing away on his pipe and scrathing his head in dissmay, as he paces back and forth between the berry bushes. A path snakes off down the mountain to the south.  Murky is here.  "Somebody help me!" Cries Murky.  

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